Important Safety Information

Are your legs keeping you up at night? You might have RLS (restless leg syndrome).

For serious.

I had no idea such a syndrome existed but I saw a commercial for prescription Requip and now I am a believer.

Requip is some kind of crazy drug that I guess puts your legs to sleep, which seems like a cool idea when you are actually sleeping but kind of annoying the other 16 hours of the day.

The Requip commercial is genius. You see this woman very troubled by her restless legs. You see this in her face. You don't actually get to see her legs going at it. I suspect she doesn't really have restless legs. Anyway, after this big fat faker takes Requip, you see her pretty much doing the same shit she was doing in the beginning but happier: lying in bed, reading a book, hanging out.

Requip is pretty impressive. You could say I was riveted to the TV.

And then it got better.

Side effects, baby. Read on.

Prescription Requip is not for everyone. Requip Tablets may cause you to fall asleep or feel very sleepy during normal activities such as driving; or to faint or feel dizzy, nauseated, or sweaty when you stand up. Tell your doctor if you experience these problems or if you drink alcohol or are taking other medicines that make you drowsy. Also tell your doctor if you experience new or increased gambling, sexual, or other intense urges while taking Requip. Side effects include nausea, drowsiness, vomiting, and dizziness. Most patients were not bothered enough to stop taking Requip.

Okay, so social contact may be a bit challenging in the beginning, what with the sweating and vomiting. What I find particularly awesome however is the risk of increased gambling and those other urges. I mean, wow! There's a drug that makes you want to gamble? I should have read closer to see what lab is behind Requip. The Tropicana maybe!

The other awesome thing about the side effects is that RLS sufferers were not "bothered enough" to stop taking Requip. That's commitment. Or sheer laziness. Or Bob just hit the triple cherry at Vegas. Ka. Ching.

In conclusion, you should always read the fine print of whatever drugs you are taking because in addition to the relief of your symptoms, said drugs may also induce weight loss (due to vomiting and nausea) or more urges! Who doesn't want more uncontrollable urges? And the gambling. Win-win all around.

Are your legs keeping you up at night? Are they?