coney coney coney

April 9, 2006

my first trip to the island. only took 11 years for me to make it to the farthest reaches of brooklyn. i cried like a little girl on the bumper cars. cupcakes had to commandeer the wheel because my eyes were closed from laughing too hard. and then i screamed again on the ferris wheel. yes, i said ferris wheel. it can be scary swinging way up there across the short buses below as you freeze your bejeezus off and sway like a banshee and the operators are mad because you had the wrong kind of wristband. so i screamed as i saw my life flash before me and imagined having to climb down that ferris wheel and one of my shoelaces gets caught in those crickety spokes and then i'm hanging for my life praying my clarks won't fail me now. thankfully we made it back to land.

coney coney coney.

that oughta do it for the next 11 years. i didn't attempt the cyclone. after close inspection, i deemed it unsafe. there are good reasons houses aren't made of wood anymore. uh, warping. uh, fire. uh, buckling. yeah, those are damn good reasons. i watched as my friends screamed for their lives on the twists and turns of that fickle beast and that was quite a bit of stomach churning in and of itself. they were good friends. oh, but they made it back to land in one piece as well.

coney coney coney.

and then the race on the beach. sadly, i lost, even though my worthy opponent was on his cell phone during the home stretch. and the righteous dudes lathering up the coppertone to tan it up on the boardwalk. so many sights to be seen and beheld and remembered.

nathan's. scary. this is why i have never and will never eat a hot dog. especially after seeing that food network special about how they fill hot dogs. gnarly. they cored and filled hot dogs with blue cheese and mayonnaise (ew) and hot peppers and all other kinds of unmentionables.

a full day. now i must sleep. sweet sweet sleep. and to dream, of scary wooden roller coasters and engorged hot dogs and old all-too-hairy men sun-bathing. sweet sweet sleep.