Monday, July 30, 2007

My degree in Detective

I'm totally studying up on how to be a detective, as in Private Eye. I saw a commercial on the teevee and I sent away for a kit. In less than six weeks, I will have my detective license. That's a license to spy. I like to call it a license in need-to-know information. I need to know and you do not.

Did you know the vast majority of detectives are hired for surveillance of a spouse suspected of committing adultery? How boring. I will reject these cases. If you don't know how to set up a Web cam and track your significant wandering other, that's your problem. I can't bail you out of everything. You're totally cramping my style in that way.

If you are considering hiring me, be forewarned that I am expensive. It's all the high-tech equipment and sexy undercover gear. Don't blame me! Sometimes what you think you want to know is worth the price. And sometimes you'd be better off buying a cup of coffee.

Word.

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