BEARD TEAM USA.
I've already made my feelings quite clear on beards. And yes, I knew about the World Beard and Moustache Championships for some time. I'm happy to report Beard Team USA kicked some bearded ass at the championships on September 1. You should totally visit their website and behold the magical mystery of the bearded: http://www.worldbeardchampionships.com
Apparently anyone can be a member. I am not a member. I am an admirer. But I could be a member if I would just email Phil. He might question my intentions though so I'm laying low for now. Phil also has a bitching beard and according to his blog, he is 251 years old. I don't went to screw around with this guy Phil. He means business. Beard business!
If anyone out there would like to join Beard Team USA on my behalf, I would totally dig that. I'd like to know if they send you a card or certificate or something, and maybe a grooming kit. That would be wicked!
Today I read all about the Beard and Moustache Categories. I had no idea there were so many flavors of beard. And they have crazy names and descriptions too!
Hungarian: Big and bushy, beginning from the middle of the upper lip and pulled to the side. The hairs are allowed to start growing from less than a maximum of 1.5 cm beyond the end of the upper lip. Aids are allowed.
I too was confused by the "Aids" but the Beard Team USA leaves no stone unturned. Aids include wax, hairspray, and other hair cosmetics. Aids do not include very small people hidden inside your beard. AWESOME!
What's more, you should totally check out the Gallery of Contestants and Champions. Prepare to have your mind blown into tiny tiny bits. I'm still picking up the pieces after seeing Memili Rustuoglu's Freestyle Moustache. This guy does not mess around. He is the real deal. Deal with his moustache!
I feel like screaming.
I am so exhilarated by my new favorite website. I can hardly sit still and you already know I'm morally opposed to sitting so imagine how crazytown I'm feeling.
Beards!
Have you tried steroid shots? Testosteron pills? or simply a tattoo of a bearded man - there as a Miami Ink episode about that ... somewhere.
ReplyDelete"Beard for All Seasons" -- Gustafer Yellowgold.
ReplyDeleteOmigod! I love beards too! I especially like a good beard-rub. Try this next time you're snogging with a beard. Try rubbing your whole face on the beard. Fun! Beards rock! For the record, though, I do not like ZZ Top at all. I hate the song 'Legs.' Now, if it were 'Beards,' well, you might just have a deal.
ReplyDelete